Responsibility

My husband has had a blog (two actually) for quite some time. A good friend recently started one as well. So I thought it was now my turn. Not long ago when my son asked why I didn't have a blog, I told him I didn't have much to say. I realize that's not true - I have a lot to say, but the question is, I don't know who wants to hear it. I guess I'll find out.

There are four priorities in my life - my husband, my children, my friends and my family. I'm sure most of my posts will be about those subjects. This time, I'll start with my friends.

I had an amazing weekend with my friends. It was Moms Gone Wild 2 - a weekend we started when two close friends moved to Texas and Florida. I thought it would be all fun and games - drinking games actually. But when I returned home last year, when I was asked how the weekend was, all I could answer was: spiritual. Not in the religious sense, but in that my spirit was touched - deeply touched - by these 7 women of various ages, strengths, backgrounds. Our kids may all be in the same age range and the reason we know each other, but we each brought something different that weekend and each of them touched my life, my spirit, in ways I had never imagined.

I returned home this year with another, different revelation. I was again expecting fun and games - again, drinking games; I was again expecting to be spiritually touched, perhaps in different ways. But more importantly, I realized something about myself that I've probably always known. I'm the "responsible one" - I was like that when I was 10 years old, and I continue to be that way now. I took care of my siblings then, and I take care of my friends now (and my family of course, but that should go without saying!). It's who I was, who I am, and who I always will be.

Why is this a revelation? As I said, I've probably known, realized, been aware of this forever. But this weekend made me face it head on. It connects me, validates me, gives me purpose. I HAVE to take care of others - it's not what I do, it's who I am. I am the one who sits in the visitor chair and gets my hand squeezed when the doctor gives the prognosis. Yes, any of the other four strong women could and would have done that in a heartbeat. But I MUST be that person. Not because I think they can't, but because I can't not.

Thanks to my friends for teaching me this without even knowing it. I look forward to learning so much more from you than you'll ever know.